Main Character level up

Dear Diary,

Today I went to the Rutgers vs. Seton Hall game at the prudential Center with my dad.

Funny enough, I couldn’t care less about basketball. If you asked me to explain the rules, I’d probably embarrass myself. So naturally, not even halfway through the game I started wondering… why did I even say yes?

Then it hit me.

Maybe this night was never about basketball. Lately, I’ve been thinking about something I call my Main Character Resume. Not the resume that gets you a job — The one that tells the story of your life. The places you’ve gone, the things you’ve tried, the people you’ve met, and the random nights that somehow end up becoming memories.

As I sat in the suite with my dad, eating catered food and talking about life, I realized this wasn’t about becoming a basketball fan. This was intentional time with my dad, getting to know his interests a little deeper, meet new people, and simply say yes to an experience I normally would’ve passed up. Cuz sad to say I was becoming a home body.

I’ve heard creators say that when you’re trying to level up your life, you should keep your head down and stay focused. I agree… to a point. But does becoming disciplined have to mean becoming boring? Just because I’m not chasing the fast life doesn’t mean I want to settle into a dull robotic life. I still want stories to tell. I still want experiences that deserve a bullet point on my main character resume.

 So I took a step out of the suite and roamed around to clear my head (my God sometime I can be such an introvert). I started to wonder at what point in my life did I start to become so boring. So I started thinking about what my interests were - which are: how to make money in non traditional ways, creating passive income, shopping, & content creation. But I sat there still sulking because none of these things were fulfilling me.  How could I be fulfilled by something I wasn’t even good at? I still felt I lacked something in my life. So I started analyzing what I've been doing and why I felt this way. Well, I realized part of the reason I wasn’t happy making art into passive income is because on a certain level monetizing it made it stressful. 

If someone asked me who I was without mentioning my job, my business, or what I do for money… what would I even say?

That question was running rampant in my mind.

Ive spent a lot of time watching videos about hobbies, researching fun activities and trying to figure out what people actually do for fun. Somewhere along the way I realized I had been living the same day on repeat. 

Cleaning.

Cooking.

Working…

The occasional outing.

Then back home to do it all over again.

There wasn’t anything necessarily wrong with my life… but there also wasn’t anything very exciting or fulfilling about it either. But in trying to find more of what I like and enjoy I discovered something about myself.

Ive noticed I don’t know how to casually enjoy things.

If I decide I want to try pottery, somehow Im researching the best studios, wondering if I should become certified, thinking how I’d market a pottery business, and mentally redesigning my entire brand around ceramics by Tuesday…

If I start dancing again, suddenly Im looking up competitions. 

If I fall in love with wellness, now Im building a business around it.

Everything I enjoy somehow starts interviewing to become my next career.

It’s honestly exhausting. 

For the longest time, I thought every interest had to become my identity. Every hobby needed to be a business model. Every skill needed to make money. If I wasn’t becoming one of the best at it, then what was the point?

But I’m learning everything doesn’t have to become productive to be valuable.

Some things are allowed to exist just because they make me feel alive.

I also realized that all this hopping from one interest to another isn’t because I don’t know who I am…

It’s actually how I’ve been getting to know myself. Every new thing I try teaches me something. Some things I quickly realize aren’t for me and some things become skills.

Some things stay hobbies and some are only meant to become one really good story.

So maybe my hobby isn’t blogging.

Maybe it isn’t content creation.

Maybe it isn’t even entrepreneurship.

Maybe my real hobby is collecting experiences and trying new things!

And adding another bullet point to my main character resume.

Ta ta for now, luv bugs 🐞- Nuni